James's Beard

A place for me to write.

Name:
Location: Cleveland, Ohio, United States

Just a young man trying to make it on sheer wit, guile, and dumb luck.

Thursday, April 24, 2008

Food For Starving Artists Officially Cancelled after 2 Year Layoff

As of this moment Food For Starving Artist has been officially discontinued. I hope this does not come as too much of a shock to the legions of Foodies, that maniacally dedicated legion of fans who, judging from the myriad comments, consist of a motley group of real estate investors, college loan consolidation experts, and Lolita sex freaks. Hopefully the more than 2 years lay off from my last post has helped wean the fanatics from the intoxicating nectar of my low-income writing.

So, what happened? How did such a great blog fail? There are many reasons. First, I got a girlfriend. Writing an ongoing blog about being poor began to feel like a bad idea if I wanted to keep her around. I started making more money. I like to think I have clawed my way up into the ranks of the lower middle class. I actually live fairly comfortably. For instance, I kept my heat on this past winter at least sixty percent of the time. I did not even feel bad about paying the bill. The foremost reason for Food For Starving Artists’ failure is I am a lazy piece of crap. I get easily distracted. The lack of any firm deadline for posting and the limiting blog concept eventually led to it simply slipping my mind.

Recently I have found myself writing less and less, which bothers me. I don’t want to sound like an egotist or anything, but looking over the old Food For Starving Writers posts coupled with past post from the Cellar Dwellers blog (cellardwellers.blogspot.com) I realized I’m not too shabby at this whole writing thing. I can come up with clever little blog post. At least, that was the case. Time spent away from writing has done nothing to help me here. Even now I find this post lacking that certain James verve which I at one time mustered. I’m out of practice. I’m old and slow of mind. I need to pick it up. The only way to get back on track is to start writing regularly again.

So, out of the ashes of Food For Starving Artists rises James Beard. This new blog will be more free form with no overriding theme. I will write what I like which will mainly consist of the comedic essays and sketches which are my bread and butter, but I will not be limited to that. I will allow myself to write on more serious subjects if the spirit moves me. You can even expect short reviews of movies or books I have been reading. James’s Beard will also be different in that I will give myself deadlines for publishing posts… loose, amorphous deadlines. I promise that I will publish at least twice a week in this space. Even if it means posting two half assed posts obn a Saturday. That is my solemn promise made mainly to myself.

I will keep the old Food for Starving Artists post up here for the time being. I do not want to alienate my core fans that have voraciously read and re-read these posts over that past two years between bouts of lowering rents, enlarging penises, and banging 14 year olds. You are the reason I am here. I shall never abandon you again.

Shalom

1 Comments:

Blogger Marissa said...

The other day I was relaxing in bed and all of a sudden my teenage step-daughter ran into the room, soaking wet in her bikini! She jumped on top of me and begged me for it! Then I asked her to leave and I finished my Sudoku.

9:03 AM  

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